Thursday, February 19, 2004

The Guy's Guide to Chick Drinks



Dinosaur vomit discovered in quarry, in mud,
hayseeds in unwashed hair, dungstain of years
under fingernails, vomit, weasel-piss ... And another thing:
I'm gone off the idea of monkey-gland injections.

This my Land. The Bikini Remover is just
a short step, after all, from the Monkey Gland celebration
of vomit. But it somehow reminded one of those
Swiss monkey-gland clinics or, much more often,

a computer; from ?boot?, collegiate slang for ?FREDDY
FUDDPUCKER HARI-KARK LITTLE BASTARD MAIDEN'S
PRAYER NR 2 MONKEY GLAND SEX?
Take him away to vomit: a) either in the sink,

if he only drank himself a small "Monkey's Gland",
kept for special occasions. It was hot: Good Morning,
Cruel World! They're so charming I want to vomit,
though perhaps it's just the wine ... and-rolls-for-$20,

the Cheez Wiz burger, the monkey burger and
monkey gland sauce, and in general, nickel-and-dime
people to death so often it makes me want
to vomit, that with his money he can afford the best

goat and monkey gland treatments in her widow's peak.
Her lips I've kissed, her glove of bones at her wrist,
that I have held in my hand, her Spanish fly
and her monkey gland. Her Godly History of the Baggots.

I noticed a small stall where an educated woman
was serving freshly brewed fake vomit. How could one
vibrating thing give so much monkey gland sauce
after the grilled steak and the tin bucket?