Sea Haggis

(after Richard Wilbur)

Medieval sailors knew how to take a dump
Enough to throw navigation off a course
By eating salted cod with a lump
Of what mariners oft refer'd to as "sea haggis"!

Imagine in your mind a kind of "woman-fish,"
Smooth mammaries arrayed with scaly fin,
A "fish lady" fashioned like a Red Lobster dish!
You feel both love for her, and a desire to in-

Gest! The stress of this will poke and twist
Your lonely, gray-brown intestines, poised
Otherwise to digest such fare. A brackish mist
Comes gurggling up from deep inside you: noise

To make a poet green! This "lump" of noise is what
I mentioned earlier: The Sea Haggis!
Add it to your salted cod, pull down your pants
And let 'er rip! It's "the shit"!