Have Yourself a Merry Little Pissmas

Merry Pissmas! Merry Dismiss! F**king liberals.
How about “We wish you a Hissy Fitness”?
I’m Cold Johnny. Well like most places, there was

A Christmas party at my job. No big deal, the problem
Is I drank too much and an honest man has nothing
To fear: beer: I'm on it dawg! So Merry Pissmas

And a happy new beer! BRING IT ON! The cleaners
They all work in vain, the shithouse poet strikes again!
ROCK ON! I'm sure the Texas audience would.

Merry Hissmas! Merry Pissmas! Merry Dismiss!
F**king liberalsi'm.. I’m not shy I'm just pissed
He’s pissed and shy. Yes, I was so numb that I

Unknowingly gave myself a golden shower.
Merry Pissmas!!! We did a Secret Santa gift exchange
On another message board I visit, so I'll be

Getting a gift from some random person too.
Merry Pissmas, assholes. I’m gonna take your momma out
Tonight, gonna show her what girls wet their pants

On Christmas Eve for charity, meandering
Across the streets; steam rose out of gutters as
Fast as bums fell into them. Vomit stained the sides

Of buildings. And to all a good Blight. Hearts frozen,
Soil sod, once more. It’s an odd little recording.
Here’s the play-by-play: may it be as wet and smelly

As you would wish it to be...Oh grumpy bear, have some
Christmas spirit, as if you snuck down their chimney, ate their cookies
And pissed on the tree applejack –– WITH THE NAUGHTY ELVES !